Finding Happiness

I felt compelled to write this blurb after being reminded in a good talk with a friend/colleague during break in October:

You cannot wait for others to hand happiness to you; you have to be proactive and find what makes YOU happy. And ALLOW yourself to BE HAPPY.

Things have been difficult as I am now removed from the structure of being schooled and the drive to achieve (grades, degrees, etc.). School is tough in the sense that you bring work home in the form of studying, writing papers, or reading; it always looms overhead.

At this point in life, I have gone beyond schooling and am supposedly free to do what I like. I have a well-paying job and am constructing a music program from scratch. Yet, I am not fully satisfied.

Well, what do I even do with my time, or free time for that matter?

For some reason I feel the "need to be productive" and focus on work in my free time, as I had been doing for the past several years. I would also like to do other things, but cannot motivate myself to do so. I have recently been asking myself: what happened to the joy of playing a great video game, reading a novel, taking a walk, playing music for enjoyment, talking with people (NOT about work), or creating things?

I feel like I'm going nuts.

I introduced the song "Simple Gifts" (a Shaker song) to my 7th graders - I think the lyrics may speak some truth in light of this craziness:

'Tis a gift to be simple, 'tis a gift to be free 

'Tis a gift to come down where we ought to be, 

And when we find ourselves in the place just right, 

'Twill be in the valley of love and delight.

When true simplicity is gained,

To bow and to bend we shan't be ashamed,

To turn, turn will be our delight,

Till by turning, turning we come 'round right.

Here's a beautiful rendition/cover done by The Piano Guys - hope you'll enjoy it :)